A Complaint

Dear The BBC,

I wish to complain about a programme I have heard about/read about (delete as applicable) in the Daily Express/Daily Mail.

I was outraged to hear/read that the programme featured a gay or gays being gay/that Jonathan Ross/some blacks/a political view I disagree with/lots of tits/not enough tits/two fucks and a cunt* and I wish to whinge on like a four-year-old who has accidentally stuck its favourite bit of Lego up its bumhole.

Waaah. Waaaaaaah. Waaah.

Yrs Sincerely

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*Note: Two fucks and a cunt does not refer to the presenters of Top Gear, a programme which I regard as exactly the kind of thing the BBC should be making more of.